I was standing outside today with my garden club at school and one of our lovely girls offered to do the sweeping. I handed her the broom and she started sweeping all the dirt towards her feet because she was never shown how to handle a broom. How are nine-year-olds getting by with no chores and no one showing them basic life skills? I don’t understand it. My son has had a broom since he was three and my daughter has been helping in the kitchen since she could talk.
You wanna know why kids are feeling entitled and why they are rude and selfish? Because that is what we are teaching them when we don’t make them help out around the house, church, or anywhere really. You are hurting your kids and the future they will grow up in. You are worried about being a good mother and for some reason nowadays that means that you do everything for your kids. Do not get me wrong I love doing things for my kids, but I also know the life we have and the adventures we plan on having, my kids need to be more self-reliant.
Nor are my kids prone to act they are entitled but I shut that down fast. The other night we came home from work after a long day and my son immediately starts hounding me for food. I told him I would cook dinner and asked him to pick up things out of the living room. After a few minutes, I found him laying on the floor, so I asked him again to pick things up. He still did not want to, claiming he was too hungry to eat. I said “Well if you are not going to help me clean, I am not going to help feed you” He had to make his own dinner and then he still had to clean.
No way I am letting my children demand everything from me. It is a give and take here.
As most know by now, we are going to be traveling for a while with the kids and I expect them to be able to handle themselves to a certain degree based on their ages. My son has been traveling through the woods with his sister without supervision for quite some time now, and in doing so there are rules he must follow. Now that we are building up the inside of our bus, I expect them to be able to help with the process. My son(7) and daughter(3) were able to paint objects inside the bus without constant supervision because I have explained to them what I expect from them and how they should help.
The Suv seats that we put in the bus were given to us for free by an older gentleman. he asked if we could send pictures of the seats on the bus to let him know it worked out for us. I finally got to send them to him yesterday after the kids painted most of the wood base the seat was bolted into. He was so happy they worked for us. after a few minutes of talking, he suggested to me that in a decade my kids would be the only well-adjusted kids I know. I don’t mind agreeing with him (cause hey, praise to my kids) but I really hope that is not the case. I am not sure if it was because he saw them painting on it or just because of the lifestyle we have chosen. But I thanked him generously anyway.
If your children are not helping you to do anything in your house, outside of the home, helping friends at school, or anything, How can you expect them to live in this world without you? What values are you teaching your kids and how are you making sure they become independent?
Yes, it is hard, I do get frustrated when I ask them to do things and they don’t do it, or do it wrong, or make an even bigger mess. But if I never let them try and set good examples for them then I don’t see how they will learn to do these things themselves. As you know I do not believe the school will teach them any basic life skills. So it is up to US to do it. Yesterday, felt so good when I got to tell the kids “Thank you” after they helped with the bus the whole day. Was the whole day perfect….NO. But they did their best. They painted, helped hold wood, Dae watched his sister and me and dad got to work almost undisturbed at tearing apart wood pallets.
And no, I do not make my kids spend their entire day cleaning and helping me. Yes, I let my kids be kids. We go to friends houses, we go to parks, we walk around the woods by the lake, and some days we spend in front of the T.V playing Minecraft together. Maybe you think you are doing better than me, Ok great. Maybe you think I am crazy for making the kids DO things instead of letting them run my house, Okay great. But this is what I feel works for my family and this is what is going to help the future our kids live in.